I didn't want to write this

Rediff is doing to Internet news what TOI did to the paper press a decade ago.

That is why I check it out every hour for updates.

Sample the headline of this new novelist off the block article titled "I didn't think I would become a Rushdie". Naturally, if I came over and told you "I never thought I would see two seven-feet tall guys with amputated arms kissing each other", you would assume that I just had. Far from it. It's more like - in my case at least - 'I never thought I would have girls screaming and clawing over me'.

I assumed that the guy is the next Rushdie being hailed by the press. Nothing like it. The guy just mentions that, for good reason, he knew he would never be Salman Rushdie. He might as well have mentioned Marilyn Monroe - because, from what his TobyYoungish book sounds like, his chances of ever becoming her are definitely brighter.

My only disappointment is that Rediff could have spiced it up a little more.

Something like 'I never thought I would be raped by Rushdie while Arvind Adiga pinned my arms and Anita and Kiran Desai held one leg each.'

or

'I never thought Rushdie would get obsessed over my fat nipples.'