Mid-year resolution

47 minutes past the stroke of midnight, I am penning this resolution which will probably peter down like a bad dream in the morning: I will try to be more socially active. No, I will pen it more humanely, I will be more involved with people.
For those who don’t know me, I live alone – absolutely so – and I spend eight hours in the office, ten sleeping and the other six lying on my bed, reading or watching movies. I sometimes get up to make myself some tea and many a times I skip making dinner for the sheer labour involved. After two years of this life, I have noticed signs of dementia creep in – I speak to myself and sometimes the two of us have such a row that we refuse to sit in the same room together, and my back’s starting to curve into a J with my lying on the bed propped on a pillow. The last time I exercised was in 1992. Luckily, I get to walk a lot since my office is within walking distance (yes! I pay pretty high rental to afford the luxury) and the place where I get the milk for my tea is at the other end of the earth; or at least a kilometre, whichever is farthest.
So expect a shake-up tomorrow as I plug back into life. Expect strains of conversations like these:

‘Hey, Andy!’
‘Who’s that?’
‘Gullu.’
‘How did you get my number?’
‘How are you, yaar? How is – is – your wife?’
Pause. ‘I got a divorce two years back, dude. In fact, you were the one who convinced me to get it.‘
‘Do you think the Congress will win this time around too?’

‘Hey, Neel.’
‘Yeah?’
‘Gullu.’
‘Oh.’
‘How is life?’
‘Ok. I got married last month.’
‘Cool. How is your wife?’
‘You mean husband.’
‘You are a woman?’