Thursday, July 24, 2008

Rassi jal gayi par bal nahi gaye

A day after the UPA won the trust vote, the Left parties on Wednesday said the victory was not a mandate for going ahead with the Indo-US nuclear deal as the “moral authority” of the Government has been “compromised” by securing majority through “bribery, intimidation and horse-trading”.

Friends, gutter-roaches, comrades,

Let me get this straight.

Does this mean that your own moral authority was permanently compromised when you were welcoming China when they violated the Panchsheel and swooped down on us in '62, or when your leader Ajoy Ghosh was making secret trips to Moscow to take instructions from your mai-baaps?

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

KArat's comment on the wad-malfunction in LS

While calling the incident shameful, despising and blah-blah, Karat deftly slips in, "The members belonging to the opposition in the Lok Sabha have been approached with money and inducements. They have spared the members of Left parties because they know they can't buy our MPs". Implying, of course, that the BJP MPs can be bought.

Touche, Karat!

courtsey: Indian Express

Monday, July 21, 2008

MS Office dictionary bogged

The dictionary in MS Office still has no entry for "blog".
The closest word that comes is "bog".

Hmm, close; but quite not close enough.

Btw, what's the spellcheck recommendation for your name? Mine is Anshuman = Antihuman.
Creepily true, won't you say?

Sunday, July 20, 2008

The Untalented Mr. Kulkarni

It's been a month since i have started reading the papers again - Indian Express, my usual favorite. my decision on papers is usually on two fronts - front page and editorials.
hence, i was surprised by the unusually harsh, anti-Congress language of a certain Mr. Sudheerna Kulkarni.
I expect people to have political affiliations, one of my favorite commentators over the years, Tavleen Singh, has always made her dislike for Congress very clearBut Mr. Kulkarni seems to regularly cross the lines with ridiculous partisanship and language unbecoming the main editorial of a national newspaper.

Sample this from today's editorial-
"How a manipulative PM betrayed the Left, forcing it to withdraw support to the UPA Government on July 8, is well known" - This is a favorite tactic of Mr. Kulkarni - Substituting facts with "is well known". Did you know about this? Was the manipulative side of Mr. Singh was so apparent to you all along as it is to Mr. Kulkarni?
The Left betrayed??? It was lucky to have any say in deciding the national politics with 39 seats - leave alone, dictating it for four whole years.

Mr. Kulkarni goes one to expound on the purpose of his editorial - "But the nation must be alerted against a new conspiracy afoot to commit another betrayal." Spare us the alerts Mr. Kulkarni. A lot of us are fairly intelligent to make our own choices. Just give us your analysis, if you're one of those experts.

He goes on to say - "Dr Singh’s government, unsure of its survival, has been desperately trying to stitch together a majority by indulging in the worst kind of horse-trading New Delhi has seen, thereby setting a dangerous precedent in national politics."
Hello? what national precedent is he talking about? Did not a similar horse-trading take place in '99 too? haven't the same criminals who are going to vote in this motion, voted before on issues the Left was an ally with? And is the UPA the only party that is not indulging in horse-trading?

He ends the editorial with an ominous - "The apolitical PM, who has never won a Lok Sabha election, may not care, but his party should know that there is a heavy price to be paid for his wrongdoings in the next parliamentary election, whenever they are held. "

What the hell! Is this an election rally or an editorial?

That led me to investigate the credentials of Mr. Kulkarni and this is what I got: The writer is a former advisor to Mr. Advani (Don't the last lines actually remind you of the man himself) and a ghost-writer of Mr. Vajpeyee's musings, whatever that means.
In short, a BJP man, out and out.

Fair. Whatever your political idealgoy and vested interests, does this man deserve to vent that in such an esteemed national space? A man whose interests are vested much deeper, the venerable Arun Shourie, can still write an editorial based on facts and following the principles of honest and rational analysis.
Mr. Kulkarni, stop thinking about the dangerous precedents in national politics: though I fail to gather what precedents are left that might still be dangerous. MLAs, even Chief Ministers, are indicted for murdering eachother, burning IAS officers, raping minors, and evicted without charge. They spend 100 crores on weddings, known to supply heroines to senior national leaders, indulge in every possible perversion, dishonesty and treachery. Do you really think some horse-trading is going to do irreversible damage?
Think about the precedent you have already set in sub-standard, partisan editorials.

And please, I told you before, stop shitting from your mouth. The good ol' Lord provided quite a wide rear for the same. It's ok to tell your party whips to take their dickie birds out of it sometimes if you have to go and take a dump. If you're too shy about it, this is what becomes of you.

Roads today

Went on to the Osian today with a new friend. Caught up a Japanese movie - Tokyo Sonata. A bit long but a good movie. An interesting company to boot. Had a hearty breakfast at Defence Colony of sausage-stuffed omlettes, bun maskas, tea, iced tea and chicken pie. Where we were seated, the light came in through a light green gauze of a curtain. There was an interesting profile shot of my friend reading the menu that I promised to catch in lens the next time around.

Came home and slept. and then caught up with a very old friend after a couple of months. Very old. Went to Huda market - had momos, a couple of rounds of tea, paranthas and some fags after a long time. Talked about - love, excitement and life: or rather the absence of all of them these days.

So, I spent the first half of the day laying new roads with someone; and the latter, revisiting old potted ones.

Sunday, July 13, 2008

Kurien's very readable dream

I have just finished reading “I too had a dream” by Verghese Kurien and I might do another reading in this very month.
After RM Lala’s “Into the Blue Mountain”, a biography of JRD, this is the best book on Indian corporates that I have read in a long time. Kudos to the straight-from-the-hip honesty and candour of Mr. Kurien and the clear easy-flowing language of the author in capturing his thoughts.
An essential must-read and must-have.

Next in agenda is the Polyester Prince, a copy of which I have been finally able to procure. For those not in the know, this is the banned biography of Dhirubhai.

Also, I was following the work of Dr. Khan, the founder of the Comilla Model in Pakistan, and his work in microfinance, separately. Kurien pinpoints that the biggest roadblock to the Indian effort in self-sufficient cooperatives were the beureaucracy: an inheritence from the Raj, built to rule than to serve, and, hence, instead of unleashing the power of the people sought to direct it to its own interests (more or less Kurien’s words. Dr. Khans beautifully egalitarian model (of having voluntary farmers units at village and central level) was undermined by the landlord elite that tilted these cooperatives in their own favor and made them instruments to promote their own private interests. Interestingly, Bennet-Owen, in “Pakistan”, cites how these elites used religion as a tool to maintain their local influence in their community and negated the social upliftment benefit initiatives from both the government (esp. Ayub Khan) and NGOs. They redesignated themselves as the peers sometimes, holy men, and hence were able to channelize the gullibility of the illiterate and the wretched lot for their own domination over them.

Gullu Advice to the Nation on a Sunday

RAW (an acronym for Research and Analysis Wing and no reference to their investigative skills) has just declared that ISI is behind the Kabul blast. Gullu called up the Intelligence chief and told him that they should seriously investigate who was in the front of it too, besides the blown away gate, of course.

Indian Express reports that Mayawati has alleged that the Centre is using the CBI to target her. A visibly distresed Gullu immediately faxed the Centre the following text "STOP USING THE CBI! TARGET HER YOURSELF!"

Gullu is also confused by the incomplete phrase appearing in TOI - Spicejet chief resigns. Resigns to what? His proclivity to flash kids or just general fate?

Gullu has just read that Dr. Talwar is free again. People in Noida with ailments ( serious, hilarious or imaginary) should really avail this opportunity and go for the free consultation day today. If the good (if rather murderous) doctor refuses, citing such trivial reasons that his daughter got murdered and he's just come back for incarceration after two months, look perplexed and ask "Ok. But I still don't see what the issue is." Make sure that you do this when the doctor has a sharp scalpel in the hand and your throat is within slashing distance.

The IAEA is still reading the draft it seems. are they frigging dyslexic? Or is the print too small to be read?

CPM says it "can" support the BJP. Gullu is confused - of course, they can. In fact, they can all paint their body red and strut naked around the streets of Delhi on a hot summer day, nekked, and act like monkeys in heat. Is that what's been stopping them to do so, so far - the knowledge of the possibility they "can"? Sheesh, there are a million can's then. Starting with the possibility of a bunch of bananas in the chief's ass is an excellent beginning.

Gullu just read that panel TV has gas. He wants to ask if that explains the strange smells in the drawing room. Related to that, he wants to ask if he lives in a red house would he be still affected by the greenhouse gas effect.

Good Morning folks. Have a nice Sunday.

A Sunday to a T

i woke up hating the world. the fact that I was helped in my resurrection act by a mobile beeping in some godforsaken corner of the world didn't help.
made some tea, took some more calls (this time from Mother Nature) which, thankfully, didn't turn out to be wrong numbers.
took my first sip of tea and I am now a Kugfu Panda.

Gullu wisdom of the day

Many a wars, many plagues
have come from a bad shite and tea in the morning.

if you want less wars, make good tea and digestive medicines.

Thursday, July 10, 2008

Alone


A laptop crashes
And I am again all alone.
A movie ends,
A book tires,
A conversation ends:
And I am left to fend for the emptiness
That rushes in.
A city sleeps beneath me
Dark, sinewy and beautiful.
A car plows in the distance
Slow, purposeful and alone;
I try to reach beyond the metal
But can’t.
A city sleeps beneath me
And I hover above it
Silent, smoking, conscious and
Alone.