Thursday, March 04, 2010

Weekend in Bangalore

Going to Bangalore after almost a year. The last time I was there, there were not many people I could meet. I have to file the property tax for my flat. While going through its papers, I realised it’s been more than four years since I booked the flat.

Life has been a roller coaster. Four years ago, I would have never thought I would be here. Four years ago, I thought I was settled for life, that I would always be in Bangalore and when the flat got complete, I would shift there and have a not-too-ambitious but happy Bangalorean life. I was learning French, photography, salsa, playing good football 3 times a week, had friends across ages, nationalities and vocations, and doing some theatre on the side. I was reasonable happy and secure – my misery was only my work. A vague hope stirred that I might do something beyond what I was doing then and I started reading about retail if it would help me snatch a position in Reliance or Birla, away from analytics.

Here I am now. Nothing but this empty rented Gurgaon flat where hours pass without a sound, surrounded with books I have never found the patience of Bangalore to read, but with the job I could only dare to dream of four years ago. What I wistfully remember now is the life I had four years ago – the activities, the stability in personal affairs.

But I strangely don’t regret it. They say you should take each day as your last but this is only entirely applicable if you’re on death parole and on a one way ticket to the noose or the chair. In life, there are moments when you consolidate. The three years here in Gurgaon, alone and semi-depressive, have changed me at an age where not many of my friends have – only ossified. Perspectives abound – nothing like seeing it in your face. And perhaps it is the age but I have started acknowledging that I was wrong about a lot of things. I can see the difference of these three years in my writing.

Things will change again.

Till then, I await meeting three friends who so much defined Bangalore for me then. Some people are gone but some remain forever. As I was speaking to one of them – we never even realised it was one of our happiest times.

3 comments:

Pankaj said...

Its nice that you can write personal stuff on your blog in addition to irreverent material, and also serious and intelligent analyses. I dont have the courage to write personal stuff on my blog (especially since my father also reads it).

aparna said...

kudos to u guls.........u have the guts to admit u were wrong .......so simply...speaks of yr humilty.....

chat said...

不勞而獲的事情,並沒有價值........................................